i fought the war but the war won't stop for the love of god

The man that brought back the ass.

Listening to: "Monster Hospital" -Metric

I get some really lovely calls at work.

Me: Hello, is Thelma there?
Cratchety old lady (possibly Thelma): You obviously don't have any respect for your own ass if you're calling someone right when they get out of the hospital.

- click -

What this woman does not know is that I have plenty of respect for my own ass.